*reads #5 and feels bad*

100 facts about me

1. I'm a bastard.
2. I'm a dick.
3. I'm an asshole.
4. I've killed a guy. But what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.
5. My dad was a legit diva who tried to murder me not one, not twelve, but a dozen times.
6. I would like to play a game.
7. Sometimes I run into walls until I start hallucinating.
8. I'm a fuckwit.
9. My milkshakes have failed to bring the boys to the yard, even once.
10. I got bit by a radioactive spider once, and all I got was a lousy t-shirt.
11. I hate u.
12. I hate ur family.
13. I hate ur friends.
14. I hate ur chicken wings.
15. My name is not Andrew Dobson.
16. My name has never been CattyN.
17. My pokemon bring all the nerds to the yard.
19. I am aware that I skipped 18.
20. There are very many people I hate.
21. I have never inflated anything.
22. I have been banned from Alamo Drafthouse.
22. I am aware that I put 22 twice.
24. I liek mudkipz.
25. My name is not IAN BRANDON SOMETHING!
26. If you paid me 26 million dollars, I would eat my own eye.
27. I am a fucker.
28. I am a stupid fucker.
30. I am a stupid fucker who doesn't know what comes after 28.
31. My full name is Jadyn Valerie Worcestershire.
32. If you paid me 26 million dollars I would allow you to tear off my arms and beat me with them.
33. I would also allow you to throw acid in my face.
34. I would even eat ur chicken wings.
35. All of the day, bro.
40. I can't count.
45. I REALLY can't count.
46. I once ate a camel's bladder, but what happens in Newfoundland, stays in Newfoundland.
47. The camel's bladder tasted better that ur chicken wings.
48. I h8 that one band, u know the one...
49. My uncle was a legit diva who kicked me in the face not one, not thirteen, but a baker's dozen times.
50. I was a human being once, but then I turned into a pie.
51. My human centipede is called the Orient Express.
52. ALL OF THE DAY, BRO.
53. I am so loving smug.
54. I just licked a table.
55. It tasted better than ur chicken wings.
56. I am currently engaged to New Braunfels.
57. New Braunfels makes better chicken wings that u.
58. My interests include my ass.
59. My current residence is ur ass.
60. My clothing size of choice is Dobson's ass.
90. I'm just gonna skip ahead here...
91. I divided by zero once.
92. That's how ur wings were made.
93. It was horrible.
94. Blood and guts everywhere.
95. ALL OF THE DAY BRO!
96. I have sent the recycle bin to the recycle bin.
97. My name is not Tom Preston.
98. My dad ate ur wings once.
99. U know what he did? He tried to kill me.
100. ALL OF THE DAY BRO!

aww this is so cool~!!!